The Rollercoaster

Many, many years ago I considered being a psychologist. I know it sounds crazy looking back, but that it one on the many major I tried as an undergraduate. In fact I started college as a psychology major and a dance minor. I only tired that hat on for a year before I realized that psychology was not for me, however the lessons taught in one of my courses stays with me to this day. Today I am reminded of one of them, we were talking about family dynamics, the entertainer, the lost child, the perfect child and to illustrate this point we watched Parenthood as a class. And I am still struck by the image of Steve Martin on the rollercoaster of life, the emotional highs and lows of living. Steve Martin wanted his life to be like the train at the amusement park, where the train never really speeds up and never goes over any bumps, but instead his life was a rollercoaster.

Whenever my life is in the down cycle I always think I want the train, but in reality I want the rollercoaster. I have tried the slow moving train and it is just not for me. I do not relish the lows and it is hard for me to see the rise when I am down but I know it is there not too far ahead. I am down but this time I don’t think I will be there very long.

On the flip side men are such funny creatures, I don’t think I will ever understand them. They are the quintessential rollercoaster in life, one-minute grand gestures of affection and the other minute completely absent. This morning the Casanova brought me candy; he left it on my desk without a note but I was certain whom it was from. A few men here bring me things but Casanova’s gifts are left with a certain flare, later this morning he walks by and tells me that he is not going to ever bring me flowers and the most I can expect from him is candy. Of course I thank him for the candy and the conversation moves onto to other things, and then he comments about the flowers I received on Friday and I say “I am a sucker for flowers” and he says I will keep that in mind. This was not 3 minutes before informing me point blank that he is never going to bring me flowers. I have not asked for flowers from Casanova or requested that he give me candies it is all so confusing.