When I rule the world
When I lead the world I am going to make the following changes:
1. I am going to change the starting time for work to 9 am worldwide, unless it is not possible
2. Police Officers are not allowed on the Interstate/Beltway or major commuting highways during commuting hours unless there is an accident. They are not helping things, if fact they are a hazard during these times.
3. People who drive below more than 5 mph below the post maximum speed limit on the Interstate/Beltway or major commuting highways will not be allowed on these roads.
4. Unless giving a speech, no one will be allowed to talk to someone else for more than 3 minutes without the other person talking.
5. Screaming children will not be allowed in restaurants, where the meal is more than $20 per plate.
6. Animal cruelty will be a felony, punishable by many years in prison
7. All amusement parks will not have more than a 30 minute wait per ride
8. American Idol will not be allowed to drag out the results show for so long!!
9. Grills will be considered stupid and uncool
10. Super Skinny will not be considered beautiful
11. Actors and Actresses will have pay caps
12. Athletes pay caps will be lower
13. People who use the phrase “You know” unless they mean to say “Do you understand?” will be fined
14. People standing behind you uninvited in your cubicle will be subjected Harassment charges.
15. Oh another thing that is going to go when I rule the world, slang. Especially when used by adults, it is better left for the kiddies who are still trying to define themselves.
Okay that is my list of things I am going to change when I rule the world, feel free to add to it.
1. I am going to change the starting time for work to 9 am worldwide, unless it is not possible
2. Police Officers are not allowed on the Interstate/Beltway or major commuting highways during commuting hours unless there is an accident. They are not helping things, if fact they are a hazard during these times.
3. People who drive below more than 5 mph below the post maximum speed limit on the Interstate/Beltway or major commuting highways will not be allowed on these roads.
4. Unless giving a speech, no one will be allowed to talk to someone else for more than 3 minutes without the other person talking.
5. Screaming children will not be allowed in restaurants, where the meal is more than $20 per plate.
6. Animal cruelty will be a felony, punishable by many years in prison
7. All amusement parks will not have more than a 30 minute wait per ride
8. American Idol will not be allowed to drag out the results show for so long!!
9. Grills will be considered stupid and uncool
10. Super Skinny will not be considered beautiful
11. Actors and Actresses will have pay caps
12. Athletes pay caps will be lower
13. People who use the phrase “You know” unless they mean to say “Do you understand?” will be fined
14. People standing behind you uninvited in your cubicle will be subjected Harassment charges.
15. Oh another thing that is going to go when I rule the world, slang. Especially when used by adults, it is better left for the kiddies who are still trying to define themselves.
Okay that is my list of things I am going to change when I rule the world, feel free to add to it.
posted by Spin_Doc1 at
12:55 PM
11 Comments:
Aren't grills ridiculous? Last week my grandson was running around with an improvised grill made of aluminum foil. Good lord!
He's only 6 and obviously impressionable, I hope his taste improves with age.
By
i used to be me, at 10:53 AM
It's hard to pick my favorites, but I think these are my top choices:
5. Screaming children will not be allowed in restaurants, where the meal is more than $20 per plate.
6. Animal cruelty will be a felony, punishable by many years in prison
The only other thing I'd request to you oh mighty ruler of the world is... can you make it so my pharmacy gets my name and meds right on the first try? Or maybe just within 2 tries. I'd take that.
By
ZooooM, at 11:03 AM
Genius,
As soon as he gets a cavity filled he won't do that anymore, band gap renormalization (scientific term), he will get shocked!
Zoom,
I will add the pharmacy thing. As a side note I am not happy without 9 hours of sleep a night!
By
Spin_Doc1, at 4:00 PM
I didn't know the scientific name for it but I know the thought of aluminum foil touching a filling makes me cringe.
By
i used to be me, at 5:09 PM
what about this one, people who throw cigarette butts out their car windows while driving on a highway will be subjected to being hung upside down by their big toe.
By
Joy, at 6:14 PM
Joy,
I like it! The world is not their ashtray!
By
Spin_Doc1, at 7:45 PM
I didn't know work does *not* begin at 9:00. Isn't that the usual time for people with a PhD?
Oh, and I'd like to mention that the people suffering most from screaming kids in restaurants are the parents themselves. In addition to have their kids scream (which feels bad) they know that everyone else is annoyed by them (which is even worse).
By
Anonymous, at 11:21 PM
Anonymous,
It only applies to expensive restuarants, people with children have to eat too. If you are at Denny's just expect there to be children there too.
By
Spin_Doc1, at 2:08 PM
Amen sista, girlfriend!
By
Joy, at 10:37 PM
I would like to add that only good drivers be allowed to drive performance cars, and said drivers should have no speed restrictions on freeways. The speeding thing works fine in Europe.
And pantyhose/stockings should come with a complimentary exchange if they ladder within 5 wears.
By
Imelda, at 7:26 AM
Imelda,
5 wears is amazing, I usually only get one wear out of them!
By
Spin_Doc1, at 10:37 AM
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