Unconditional Love

The first time I loved unconditionally.

I was raised in a very clean house; in fact some would say an immaculately clean home. My mother was insane when it came to keeping the house clean, if she returned from work in the middle of the night and the kitchen was dirty she would drag me out of bed to clean the kitchen. My mother would pull me out of school in the middle of the day if I did not make my bed only to drag me home to make my bed and then return me to school. My mother’s schedule was sporadic and it took me until about age 12 before I would call the dispatcher daily to see when she was scheduled to arrive. As soon as I heard from the dispatcher that she had arrived at the terminal there was a mad dash to have the house perfectly clean for her.

My mother’s obsession with having the house clean meant that I was raised in a pet free environment. Pets were too dirty in my mother’s opinion to live in the house. As children when we attempted to bring home pets my mother would promptly take them to the animal shelter. I am my mother’s daughter in many things, including being a clean freak (however I hire house cleaners to achieve this). I also inherited my mother’s belief that animals were dirty and should never be in the house. Therefore as an adult pets were not allowed in my home, but after 3 years of begging and pleading I relented to the man in my life that he could have a dog.

I put strict requirements on the dog’s role in our house. The dog was to be an “outside” dog. When she was inside she was only allowed on her dog bed and was not to wonder anywhere else in the home. This was to eliminate the amount of dog hair that would be in the home. Willow (the dog) was born on November 1st, and I started reading all the dog books that I could. I started taking her for mini trips when she was about 4 weeks old, to get her used to me. I refused to notice how super cute she was, she was after all just a dog.

I brought her home Christmas day, a present for the man and it was too cold outside for her. So, I had the house all ready for her, complete with her dog bed. I set her down on her enormous bed and the first thing she did was wander off the bed. I picked her up by the scruff of the neck (just like the books instructed) and she let out the mostly heart piercing cry. I melted!! From that day on she ruled my life. I loved her completely and totally. I rearranged my entire life for her. I found her a dog sitter so she never had to spend a moment alone. I put her on my bed and snuggled her to sleep every night. In my mind she is the most beautiful, perfect dog on the planet. She does nothing wrong, I love her completely and unconditionally. I don’t even care that she leaves her hair everywhere.

I am ready to love unconditionally again, I am ready for another dog.