Calling all Women

Any volunteers? Come on people it is for a great cause!

Another entry from the Lawyer

My brother is doing a snowball study for his research methods psychology class. Could you please answer the following questions and send it back to him. His email address is notarealemail@gmail.com

Thank you,

The Lawyer

1 On a guy what is your favorite body part? (Please keep it clean)

Arms

Chest

Back

Shoulders

Legs

Butt

Abs

Other ________

2 Please rank the following

Arms

Chest

Back

Shoulders

Legs

Butt

Abs

Other ________

3 What type of guy to do like?

Skinny

Average

Athletic

Muscular

A few extra pounds

More than a few

Other_____

4 Do you find vascularity attractive? (IE veins)

yes

no

other________

5 Is bigger better?

yes

no

6 Is there such a thing as too big?

yes

no


My response

What the fcuk!! Is bigger better? What kind of question is that? We all know what went through my mind when I read that question, but the real question is what was going through his mind as he wrote it?

1 On a guy what is your favorite body part? (Please keep it clean)
Arms
Chest
Back
Shoulders
Legs
Butt
_Abs_
Other ________

2 Please rank the following
Arms 3
Chest 2
Back 5
Shoulders 6
Legs 7
Butt 4
Abs 1
Other ________


3 What type of guy to do like?
_Skinny_
Average
Athletic
Muscular
A few extra pounds
More than a few
Other_____

4 Do you find vascularity attractive? (IE veins)
yes
_no_
other________

5 Is bigger better?
_yes_
no

6 Is there such a thing as too big?
_yes_
no

Craft Projects

Last night I spent hours on the phone comforting a distraught friend. Ms. Distraught has been dating a man for a few months. The relationship started out very slow, Ms. D comes from a very conservative background. The relationship is still young, in the fact that they have not had sex but do fool around on the couch a lot. However the drama started last night when to two of them were out he told her that she should change her hair. I was shocked. She has long, thick dark beautiful hair, and I have always been under the impression that men like long hair. Perhaps I am wrong. Through out the rest of the evening he kept fixing her appearance, straightening her sweater and her necklace, as if to say you’re a mess let me help you out. The final kicker was when he offered (unsolicited) to help her pick out her clothes, saying “I have a wonderful sense of style”. Which is true, I have met the man. Ms. D replied that she wasn’t a craft project that needed to be changed, and I fully agree with her. I also told her she should seriously reconsider dating a man that is so highly critical of her appearance so early in the relationship. I am under the impression that women are always thinking of ways to change the men in their lives and not the other way around. Is this guy way out in left field or do men look for a craft projects when looking for love?

A entry from the Lawyer

I just received the following email from the Lawyer


The people I work with are not as bad as the people you

work with, but I feltkind of sorry for one of my lab

mates today. So instead of waiting for my friends

to get out of the physics seminar and eating lunch

with them I went to lunch with one of the most obnoxious

grad students I have ever had the misfortune to work

with.  I invite him to join me and he brings papers to

read... then as we are walking over there he says he

didn't bring them to read, just to admire and show off.

turns out they were some he wrote awhile ago.  It

was such a I want to prove how good I am moment 

I wanted to just tell him I

wasn't hungry and go back to the lab.

Oh well.  

Hope your day is better than mine.

Unfortunately my day is not better, 

but it is going to get better.  

We made the playoffs, and tonight is our first playoff game!

Forty Nine things about me

Seven things I like about myself

1. My eyes


2. My brain


3. My friends


4. My height


5. My car


6. My career


7. My music

Seven things I want to change about myself

1. I would like to have a flood gate between my brain and my mouth


2. My age


3. My family


4. My childhood


5. To be funnier


6. More charming


7. And honest

Seven things I want to do before I die

1. Learn to play the piano


2. Travel to Venice


3. Speak another language fluently


4. Run a marathon


5. Learn to paint


6. Swim with the sharks on the Great Barrier Reef


7. Have a loving, supportive relationship with my family

Seven things I wished I had never done

1. Childhood


2. Stolen my sister’s Barbie on Christmas day


3. Not shared my slurpee with my sister


4. Contacted my estranged sister


5. Get married at 19


6. Get divorced at 20


7. Drop out of high school

Seven things I say the most often

1. Dude


2. God Damn It


3. Not so much


4. Good luck with that


5. Wax on, Wax off


6. Oh my god


7. Whatever

Seven things I can do

1. Mathematics


2. Physics/Quantum Mechanics


3. Dance


4. White Water Rafting


5. Hook up any and all electronics


6. Count cards (when sober)


7. Speak in public

Things I can't do

1. Cook


2. Sing


3. Play a musical instrument


4. Tell a good wine from a bad one


5. Sew


6. Back bends


7. Say no to a sale

How to make a woman feel special

I have recently run across a bizarre mentality among men, they seem to think all women are gold diggers. I don’t know where this comes from; maybe it is just the women that they meet. I am a professional woman and all of my friends are professionals and perhaps this is why I don’t see the gold digger aspect that men complain about. If I want a fancy dinner, I will go to one; I can afford it and I don’t need a man to buy it for me. This is true of all my friends too, what we do need is to be romanced. This does not require a man to spend a lot of money, but it does require some thought and time. A man can initially substitute spending a lot of money for romance, and I think this might be where the confusion lies. What all women want is to feel special, and we like men to help us feel that way. So to all you men out there, the following is a list of ways to make a woman feel special without breaking the bank.

1. Listen to her.

2. Remember the names of the important people in her life.

3. Do not act like the ONLY thing you are interested in is sex

4. Buy her little things when stopping at the gas station

5. Always say yes to the guy selling flowers in Adams Morgan

6. Plan a special event, that involves a lot of thought like a picnic in the park

7. Watch her favorite TV shows with her, even if it is Gilmore Girls and don’t make fun of it while watching

8. Like her cat/dog

9. Always dress to impress her

10. Volunteer to go everywhere with her, even to the grocery store

11. Have her favorite snack/drink on hand in your place

12. Write her a poem, or at least send her one that reminds you of her

13. Appreciate the music she listens too, and the books she reads

14. Compliment her, but on the things that don’t normally get compliments, examples; her laugh, her bone structure, her shoes, her intelligence and knowledge

15. Go out of your way to introduce her to your friends

16. Take her somewhere or do something that only she wants to do

17. Listen to her bitch about the same thing forever, and don’t try to fix it or her

18. Just grab her hand or put your arm around her as you are walking down the street or sitting near each other

19. When you are out and she is not having a good time, take her home in the middle of party or night of drinking even when you are having a blast

20. Sometimes just a quick touch to her face or arm makes her feel special

21. Be supportive of the things she likes to do, for example attend her football games

22. Cook for her

23. Pick up after yourself when you are at her place

24. Use words like captivating and enchanting when describing her

25. Send flowers to her work place

26. Hold the door open for her

27. Random calls, just to say you have been thinking of her

28. Hug her the first time you see her in the day

29. Know exactly what kind of coffee she likes.

30. Offer your jacket when she is cold, even if you are cold too.

Weekend Summary

Friday night I watched movies and drank a few beers and called it a night by 10:30 pm. I know the riveting life of a party girl. I am sure everyone is jealous of my living on the edge lifestyle.

Saturday day I had a pedicure. On some level this is suppose to be a relaxing and enjoyable experience but it really isn’t for me. Oh I like how my feet look afterwards, but all that scrubbing and shaping kind of hurts. I do like to have my feet rubbed, perhaps next time I should just go for the massage. Then I came to work for a few hours before my big date with the parents. I had a meeting with one of my co-workers and we briefly talked about the parents evening. I told him I was concerned that they were going to find out I am a flaming liberal, and he was shocked that anyone would ask political and religious questions when first meeting someone. With in 5 minutes Courtney’s parents had managed to ask me, not only what religion I was but what I thought about our president. I answered in a very PC way. I said “I think he (W) is doing what he feels is best for the country.” I did not add that I think he is totally wrong and a religious fanatic, but some things are best left unsaid. In general, most the people I meet ask me very personal questions within minutes of meeting them. I think this is because I come across as a very open and understanding person. Maybe I should go into acting.

Sunday I watched my new team win the season’s championship game. I did not really practice much with the team, but I did get to meet my new teammates. I am a huge fan of hockey. I understand the game and the strategy involved. I also know the lingo, which a vast improvement over my football knowledge. I have never played hockey before but it really did not look that hard. I could definitely be more of a hockey kind of girl than a football one. I will let you know our first game is in two weeks.

I am really a skiing kind of girl, but the snow out here sucks! And what is up with the whole double black diamond slopes? Who are they kidding? Nothing (except a complete vertical drop) is that difficult when the run in only 700 feet. Before I moved out here I skied a mountain that required the skier have an avalanche locater beacon and a shovel to ski the double black diamond (which I did not). Now that is truly double black diamond!

Home cooked meals

After a desperate attempt to find something really interesting to do tonight I have decided to buy a 6 pack of beer, curl up on the couch and watch TV. It is probably a good thing that I am not going out tonight; I do have a busy weekend. I have to work tomorrow and Saturday night is my night to meet the parents! I have already been warned that I can’t let them know that I am an atheist. Apparently that information is a deal breaker. However it always seems to come up. The subject usually starts with

“What do you do?” Them

“I am a scientist.” Me

“Oh so you believe in evolution.” Them

“Believe, that is a funny choice of words it is not a belief it is a theory.” Me

“So do you believe in God” Them

“No” Me

However I am going to try to avoid the conservation at all costs. I don’t want Courtney’s parents thinking I am the devil, here to convert their daughter to the dark side.

Sunday is my first floor hockey practice, and there is a super bonus to this event. My co-worker (who recruited me) invited me over for a home cooked meal before practice. Bonus! You might not understand what that means to me. The only home cooked meals I get now come from invites. I am the top ramen, frozen pizza and cereal queen. I love home cooked meals, but not enough to cook them myself. I am always trying to get invites to dinner. I only get about one or two invites a month, so the rest of time I eat like a graduate student. Yes, I could afford to eat better, but I am really lazy when it comes to eating. If it takes me more than 5 minutes total to prepare it, I am just not going to do it. I do eat out a lot, but that gets old too. Home cooked meal for the Spin Doc this weekend.

Game 5

Tonight is our 5^th game and I am once again struck by how much I love playing football. The games seem to pass so fast. I lose track of everything when I am on the field, and fortunately I am athletic enough to play the entire time. For example during our second game it was raining. Before the game I sat on the sidelines huddled under my umbrella, much to the amusement of my team members. However that was the last time I felt or noticed the rain until I was in my car driving away. I thought “Wow, I did not realize that it was still raining.” Last week’s game occurred in freezing cold weather. I was so cold that I ran over to the near by Sport’s Authority and bought a new under armor shirt to help ward off the weather. Once again when the game started, and I was no longer cold. I did not notice anything but the game. I usually can not turn off my mind, and it churns a hundred miles a minute thinking/obsessing about the stupidest stuff. I do have the ability to lose myself when I dance but I have never so completely lost myself as I do in football.

I would like to note that I don’t think it is the best place to pick up on the opposite sex. Oh I do play with some really hot men, but we all take the game so seriously. I have been playing/practicing with these people for months and I am not sure of anyone’s relationship status. I do know their strengths and weaknesses on a football field, if that helps. They are really cool men, not the freaks and geeks that surround me at work.

Popularity Contests

It is amusing how when decades removed from high school people still acted like they are in high school. Whenever you get a small group of people (scientists) get it always turns into a popularity contest.

This morning I had a meeting with my fellow scientists, there were a total of 18 people present and I was the only woman in attendance. I know big shocker there. I arrived a few minutes early into the conference room where there are approximately 45 chairs. I was the 4^th person to arrive and promptly sat down in the second row with an empty chair on each side of me. As each scientist walked through the door they expectantly looked around for a group of friends (or at least a friend) to hale them welcome and of course beckon them over. Of course the scientist that were already seated looked up hoping someone, anyone, wants to sit with them. Slowly the room filled up and everyone was sitting in their own little isolated place, except for me. Now I am not saying I won the popularity contest, but I am a curious observer of the human condition. How it is possible after all these years these grown men still have the mentality of high school students at lunch looking for friends?

And how is it possible after all these years, even among their peers, they still don't have any friends?

Right from Wrong

I have multiple topics that have interested me today for my blog, and you might actually have to deal with two entries. However let me start with the one that completely pisses me off! I have encountered this mentality infrequently because I am mainly surrounded by educated and open minded people but every once in awhile out of left field it hits me. I recently was engaged in a conversation about the ills of pornography. I am mixed on the issue. I see both sides of the social argument and therefore just stay on the sidelines with my opinion. I said this during the conversation. The person I was talking with immediately said, “Well since you do not believe in God I can understand why you don’t have a strong opinion against it.” I replied that “I believe in women’s rights, and not objectifying a woman’s body but I am not sure how this applies to pornography.” Now it hits me what this person was implying, since I don’t believe in God, I am incapable of knowing right from wrong! What is up with that?!! I can quote an enormous list of ills committed throughout history in the name of God. Since when did we atheist give up the moral high ground to the god fearing public? If anything god allows for a fukced up sense of right and wrong, just see Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer. I personally have a very strong moral code based on empathy and sympathy for my fellow human beings and the other residents of planet earth. My sense of accountability is not based on fear of burning eternally in the depths of hell. Why do people who believe in a god think that people who don’t are not good people?

What is a woman to do?

The dilemma of the week is the proper way to respond when falling in love. Now I know we all say no games, but it seems there is always a little game playing so how is a woman to do it correctly? Let me give you the scenario, a friend of mine has been dating a man for a few months, and she is “pressed”. In fact they are both “pressed”, they talk on the phone multiple times a day, email each other constantly and see one another when ever possible. This weekend they consummated their relationship (did the deed), and he spent the night too. However she immediately started questioning and analyzing everything from that moment on. Now I know we women put too much emotional baggage onto sex, but for this blog let’s assume that we do and we can’t change. I mean she did put emotional baggage on the sex act and there is no going back now. So the “day after” played out in the following way, he emailed her, she emailed him back, 5 hours later he emailed her back, she immediately emailed him back, he sent her a text message that said “Call me when you get home”. Now this exchange is a little cool compared to their previous exchanges, in addition he was cool the morning after. My friend is completely stressed that she had sex too soon, and that he is not all that into her anymore, etc. My advice to her was to not call him, wait for him to call. I thought this was fabulous advice; however another man said to invite him over that night for a follow up booty call. I think that is a terrible idea! Here she is falling head over heels for a guy and she should back up and get a little perspective. So we women need advice, what is a woman to do in this situation?